Vista Tutorial - IMAP deletes just go away

Using Vista Home Prem and Windows Mail on an IMAP server. When I delete a
message it completely disappears immediately, which is not what I want. I
prefer the strike through with the message remaining until I Purge. I have
the option to use the deleted folder in Advanced options unselected, but it
seems stuck in this setting. Is there some way I can revert to all the
default settings, and so restore the ability to select the behaviour I want
please?

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Peter in New Zealand. (Pull the plug out to reply.)
Collector of old cameras, tropical fish fancier, good coffee nutter, and
compulsive computer fiddler.